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Forces: T.J.’s Gift
Family builds inspiration from loss
Sarah White’s little brother, T. J., was not supposed to live a short life. An active, fun-loving 9-year-old, he loved to play competitive games and athletics. Kids liked him. Teachers liked him. In May of 2004, T.J. was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia (AML), a fast-growing cancer of the blood and bone marrow. T.J. died on October 28, 2004.
Sarah White playing golf with her brother, T.J.
T.J. left behind Sarah, a Mizzou preprofessional physical therapy major, and his parents, Mike and Michelle. Rather than think about what should have been, the family created a legacy of hope and courage in T.J.’s honor. Their help to others who grieve ranges from building a memorial park in their hometown of Pleasant Hill, Mo., to raising money for a cure for AML. The White family is a force to be reckoned with.
“After he passed away, we not only wanted T.J.’s life to be remembered, but also the lives of others whose lives ended too soon,” Sarah says. “We wanted to create a peaceful memorial park as an uplifting place for people to remember their loved ones.”
A plot of land was donated in Pleasant Hill, a town of 5,500 southeast of Kansas City, and the White family raised $150,000 in funds and materials to build the park. Various companies donated concrete, landscaping bricks, statues, plants and lighting. Statues of children and memorial stones dot the landscape of this place for meditation and solace. The Avenue of Angels is a winding walkway of paving stones leading to a memorial wall. Both are dedicated to people whose lives were cut short. The idea of the Avenue of Angels walkway was taken from the Give Kids the World Village in Orlando, Fla. where the White family went on T.J.’s Make-AWish trip two months before he died.
“The stones in the Avenue of Angels not only carry a person’s name, they have a message about that person as well,” White says. “It is a living memorial, meaning people will continue to be able to purchase a stone for their loved one, have it engraved, and set in the park.”
With the park completed, the Whites continued their leukemia research public education and fundraising campaign. The next activity would be a marathon. Mike and Michelle started raising money and trained to compete in the P.F. Chang Rock ’n Roll Arizona Marathon. Sarah helped by selling yellow wristbands.
“They were really popular at the time. I chose yellow to represent childhood cancer and we had the word ‘courage’ embossed on them,” she says. Sarah smiles when she says it was T.J. who really had the courage in the family. She notes that courage is a word that represents all cancer patients because of the dignity, charisma and perseverance they show during there treatments.
Four hundred wristbands and other successful fundraising efforts later, the White family skipped the marathon and donated all money raised, over $4,000, to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. They’re likely not done. They want to give back to a world that gave to T.J. and to them. Sarah decided on a health professions career after watching the loving care her brother received. She solidified that goal with two years of volunteer work at Children’s Mercy Hospital and Clinics in Kansas City, Mo.
“You learn a lot of things when someone you love dies,” she says. “Money isn’t important. Material possessions don’t matter. We have realized what truly is important in life. We received many acts of kindness when T.J. was sick — meals and cards — and we know how that felt. It made all the difference for us and we just want to give back.”
Related Links
- SHP Department of Physical Therapy
- The Health Connection
- National Institutes of
Health (NIH) - Touchstone, Spring 2008
T.J. White enjoyed playing and watching sports. His sister is keeping his spirit alive through cancer fundraising and education.
Page last updated on: August 25, 2009
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